i somehow somewhat chiong through my pw.. with very messy info but still readable. i dont have any format to follow cause' i was using the other com.

actually i agree with letty that i love pw. if all others subjects never existed. even if i'm tired, i can focus on it.

the weight of your words. actually i really don't know why. but i think it's normal and abnormal. and even if whatever i think im feeling is true, it doesn't matter. now i wonder why.

it's time to.. really focus. because i still have big three weeks. think about it, it's enough for those of us who have not done anything concrete to salvage things. my aim isn't high or low. it's within my capability. it's called: doing my best with all my heart. (:

long awaited meet-up

It's been so long since I went back to NV. Even though it's just a street across my house.. It's just like 'so near yet so far' kinda feeling. The nostalgia seemed to be covered up by the joy of meeting my good old friends.. I'm really glad to meet up with all of them, especially teachers whom have left deep impression in my life.
Some of us flew to the gym at Sengkang Sports Complex. My first visit to a gym and I think the running thing was scary because after running, I felt like I was going to tumble and I tumble-hopped down the running machine. I felt like a little kid in a playground. Everything's so interesting at first sight. =D
All in all, Im really grateful for all my friends and the times we spent together. Thank you guys for yesterday.


Mr Aw, my Math teacher who has a unique sense of humour and he's like a grandfather to us. My heart melted when I saw him reading my letter intently. (:

Mr Rashidin. Though he didn't teach us for long, his smile always cheer us up. And he gets 'tormented' by Juv and my 'Spongebob' actions. =D

Ms Chang, whom we always tease as Chang E jiejie. We'd always ask her if she flew to the moon and ask her to bring mooncake back. =D

Cherlyn, very close friend for two years and counting. Her taste in clothes is forever better than mine. =D And she doesn't hide her love for her friends.


Ck, a very 'on' friend. We like to act cute together. =D

Dong! He's very very gentlemen-ly and likes to do weird actions. =D 4E2's boss.



Lewis. He likes to be disgusting (haha) and give constipated looking face. A guy who can be serious and loves Bryan's leg a lot. (:

Chinchin! My three year seating partner who plays along with me whenever I have something up on my sleeves. =D She has strong compassion for people.

Janice. She's brilliant and sporting in the things she does. Someone who laughs alot too and aims high in the things she does.

Jm, the girl who always seems disinterested and dao looking. =D Sister in christ who knows when to listen, when to speak, and when to comfort.

Priscilla. A great laughing partner to be with who does scuba-diving style of laughing. =D She has a passion for dance and seeks to do well. (:

Xiaoxian. Going more and more feminine but still has the capability of roaring at people. =D

Juvenal Chan! My favorite acting-disgusting partner. We composed weird songs and love to joke together. =D



I'm sorry, we still quite patriotic. *Makes vomiting expression.

A multitude of expressions..







On the box that was randomly placed on the roadside..




And the unopened highway. =D


The road goes on.

there is joy for me to take

'Koped' from sophia.

Yesterday.... some of us went for CP, distributing cereal and stuff. It was quite fun, and at one unit we met this girl who was from Philippines, and here for vacation. She's so sweet. I wish Chesed was there to talk to her. Haha. I think it's quite interesting. We did not finish the whole block but just on a few storeys, we met many different people.
Today is the heartstrings walk. I can't wait for it. (:

Today, I was reading this commentary and it talked about joy and perspectives. I don't quite know how to express the bit of bitterness that I feel sometimes within me. Not too long ago, I remember asking my friend, "Do you think we are sad easily?" His prayer answered my question. God will help us to lead victorious lives! How vulnerable we are.. how weak we feel.. He will be my joy because He is with me. All the time. We don't have to feel His presence, we just need to know and trust.

rain down

Tomorrow is scripture reading for J2s. I'm not panicky.
Because I think God has already done the amazing job.
That I can pray in front of a crowd.
That I can lead worship for a song that I somewhat learnt the day before.
Actually, I still can't quite comprehend.
It's just so amazing that it's not for me to truly be able to understand.
(NV debaters, you guys should understand how I feel.)

The wows are for God. (:

and we come

Ecclesiastes 9:10 Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might, for in the grave, where you are going, there is neither working nor planning nor knowledge nor wisdom

I have been thinking of this verse these few days, and I remember it as the one Bryan sent to me on my birthday. It got me thinking.. of how short our lives are, like a flower that withers quickly. And how we spend our time.. I think it's really hard to make your every single min productive and meaningful.. Sometimes I don't even know why I'm sitting down there moaning. But as I'm typing this, I remember that God told me to "stop trying so hard", but let go and let God. When will I truly learn to do that?

Friday, we were having extended chapel. To Ruimin: I'm really glad to see you! =D I hope the programme was good. (: Anyway, some of us stayed backstage and some really cool stuff happened which I won't share here. Haha. But really, I'm glad we could contribute something through acting.
Joyce, Josh and I went for Wanhui's Young Adults cell as a visitation and it was quite a new experience overall. Just quite different but fun. And I missed my show.. 2weeks in a row)=

Saturday, we had zonal bonding and it was quite good. Some of us organised games and even though it was a little screwed up, still the people enjoyed. And the stayover became more like a cell bonding. To rest of the cellmates, we really missed you guys. )=

EOM. Just some stuff that I really need to hand to You Lord. I am so worried over my promos. I'm sorry for saying that I can do it, sounding like I don't need You. No.. like right now ( and in everything I do) I really want Your involvement.

i love singapore! (:

(:::: BFC 08'
(adding SOPHIA AND YEOMEI (sorry i forgot to mention you guys), chuichui, fiona and sherman inside, we will then be a complete chicken rice.
yes without you guys we are like chicken rice without chicken.)

I know you guys are touched by my mushy lines. Haha! But it's truly what I believe the cell feels. You know, God continues to bring our lost sheeps back and I don't know how to thank Him. All I can say is.. I'm really grateful and exploding with joy? (:
I think this National Day is the most meaningful one I ever had. I used to think watching parade is ultra boring.. but when you watch with your friends and family, it's just so different. The atmosphere is like LIVE right where you are standing/sitting/snoring. Firstly, we had a really great sermon to begin with which got me thinking of something that happened not long ago. And then we welcomed our adults who were back from visiting residents around. It was just so great, welcoming them with a radiant smile and they go, "I feel like a VIP!" =D Then there was the prayer which me and this leader made on the stage, and we were like encouraging each other in our seats one min and the next we did it. (: Then cell went to serve the adults with the buffet and it was really fun cause we were all so busy. Some of us stayed behind to help auntie sweep the floor. And we had this really funny conversation.. "If my mum saw me doing this, she'd go, why I don't see you doing that at home??" Hehe. (:

Happy belated birthday to Charis and Dong. (:

be humble, my heart

Called to be a student.

I guess I should just make a list of 'Looyee DON'T(S)" so that I will really study.
And btw, I don't know where we're heading for our GP presentation.. Just a random thought.
Yesterday's celebration was short and.. we only had one activity. I think the sing-along was quite nice because it's quite tough for the class to gel together but we somehow did.
Wonder how it would be if it was 4E2..? It would be catastrophic. (: But victor really looked ridiculously funny with his durian shells! Haha.
AND LIRUIMIN CAME. (: Even though we couldn't lunch together.
Next was the acting rehearsal. Which I missed previously cause' I was really sick. Samuel was really good. Then we lunched and had some thought-provoking discussions which I didn't want to get into because my head's growing bigger.. But I'm glad we had it, it made me thinking. (: Controversial.

Actually I have nothing much to blog about besides how loud an amen I gave in my heart when Rachel prayed for perseverance for PW, and how much I want to study but just cant get myself settled down to study. Meanwhile, I'm still waiting... 4 anticipations in a week. My heart can't bear such excitement.

You help me speak, sing and pray k?

2 Tim 1:7
For God has not given us a spirit of timidity, but of power and love and discipline.

I need to remember this assurance. In my heart, not just my head.
I still remember what Benedict said. When you give it to God, the results are excellent.
----------------------------------------------------------
While talking to Joyce a while ago, I was reminded of how God has been preparing me.
God is faithful.
Yesterday's sermon came at the right time.
God believes you can do it, stop self-doubting!

god speaks

New friend, introducing Pursley. (:


Given by Rebekah. (: When I stepped up. It was unexpected and her message for me really melted my heart. So thoughtful and sweet. It's like this friend of mine is going be with me as I perform my duties. Haha. I know there are things in store. I was trembling a little but now I will remember God's assurance.
Fighting too hard. (If you think it's good, think again. Weak and fighting.. for human pride?) When we try to fight on our own, God can't help us because we are unwilling to let Him. Learning to hand it to Him.

willingness

My heart sings a song that even angels cannot sing..

I've always loved this line.. how it's a privilege that my relationship with God is probably different from angels'. How I went through things with Him by my side, how He hears me when I cry for help.. The truth is, there are so many times when I just felt so upset by the nitty gritty things around me. That sometimes I even wonder why God cares so much about my whining. If I were God, I would just look at the girl down there on earth and say, "Aiyah, it's just a small problem. Come find me for what." But He's just so ready to comfort me with His word.. How could I have overcame my fears, my inadequacy etc..

This time, this promos. I really need to stop sleeping. Like today during geog, I think I was sleeping with eyes opened until when my teacher called me to answer a question. I don't know if he caught me sleeping, but I know he is really good and understanding teacher. So I can't possibly disappoint him again right. And my parents too.. They see that my results ain't good but they've never scolded me nor gave me stress. I need to wake up and realise that people are concerned about me.. Yep. (: I must remind myself of what I've just typed out. Motivation against oversleeping.

On a lighter note, today was the SFC commendation. I'm so delighted. I guess one thing is that I know God has things in store for me. Okay, I didn't memorise the pledge well so I kinda mumbled along the way, but I'm so grateful that despite the two nightmares (which I rejected) the previous night, everything went smoothly. (: