I just realised something. I talk as if my last paper on tues does not exist. Haha. A while ago, I was talking to myself and wondering if the 5 marks are worth it. Actually it's a ten. I don't see why I can't aim for the A, right?
Sometimes, just before we start something, we begin by feeling hopeless. Ha.
I guess that's something I have to do, change my mindset. It's been so long, since secondary school that I begin to deal with this confidence thing. But I guess it's been getting better since the transition. Weird.
Anyway, to those still having papers. It must be hard to focus esp when people scream out, "Promos is over!" (i admit im one of them, even tho mine's not over yet. haha) but work for the results. I'm especially proud of Joyce who is disciplined in her studies. (: Have a blessed promos.

I don't know how to call this. It's either joy, or just a sudden sense of euphoria. Maybe it's both.

Because one thing I know for sure, I grow with greater dependency on God in this exam. For peace, for wisdom, for meaning. I think the worse thing is to doing something and losing the purpose of doing it. You know, it was during today's exam that I realised it's not just about remembering the facts, it's also about persevering on during the last few minutes.. or maybe even at your second essay out of three. I think being an art student means facing more and more essays so I have to start loving it. And I think two SEA topics is heavy. I was so proud of myself for actually finishing the three essays without giving up. To me, it's an achievement.

So to those still having exams, those having O levels, those studying for grades that you have not seen but believed in, persevere on with the end in mind. (: It may be tough, but it's always what you're clinging on to which makes the journey much more easier and worthwhile.
---------------------------------------------------------

Just to share about what I've been doing. Don't think that I've been a good girl and abstained from the computer. Haha. It's just I hadn't found the time, or the mood to really pen my thoughts down. My mum just bought a disc on Pastor Benny Hinn. There was healing in the place and the video really got me wowed. Imagine a young girl being filled by the holy spirit and speaking in front of the crowd. Imagine a man in the choir being healed and he threw his crutches down and ran to the front to tell of what God does. I always feel that it's difficult to comprehend how awesome God is even though we always sing songs like, 'How great is our God'. I think I just had a glimpse of God's healing power in people's lives. (:
I really miss a lot of my friends. Can't wait to catch up with them. Hopefully soon.. And there's school on marking day somemore. PW lectures, here we go again. Persevere on people. (:

God, grant me wisdom.

James 1:5 If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.

I know that even if I learn everything by heart (apparently, I've only finished 3 chapters out of everything), and yet do not even understand what the question asks, there's no use at all.

And I know that even if I do well, yet God isn't involved, there's no meaning at all.

Thank You for salvation and for the many seemingly little things that we are entitled to, yet given to us by a heavy price.

God is beautiful. We may not comprehend many times what He's doing, but one thing we need to know, He is good and worthy of all our praises.

And this post is for Pang Hui Chin. (my head is still bigger, as usual (: )

Hey dearest. I've always related you as the 'sitting partner for three years'. You know, I still remember for the first two years, things never went well in our friendship but it did not end up that way. I'm glad because we spent the next two years 'ba chor mee-ing' and even sharing some of our best moments in choir as seniors, as friends, as close sisters even though not blood-related and let's not go into biology. (: Thank you for the wonderful times that we've spent joking around and I bet it has been a real torture (but a fun one) especially when we keep pulling each others' chairs. (: I just want to tell you that even though I don't hangs these words on my lips all the time, I love you as a friend. (:

a friend loves at all times

This post is dedicated to my dearest (not) Li RuiMin. (:

I've been wanting to post this on the day you're going to leave. Sorry for delaying it until now. )= Btw, that's a really nice picture with Letitia's stoning face behind. (:
Friend, it must be tough to leave everything in Singapore, the wonderful food, wonderful people like me. (I can hear some of them saying it's good that you left me behind. (; ) By the way, they are still bullying me so don't you worry. Haha. Hope that as you continue to learn Cantonese, things will go well for you and the people there sounds nice according to your description. This is a time when you learn to be stronger so cherish all the experiences that you can learn from. I'm glad for you that you don't have to sit for Promos (haha!) and strive hard for dance alright! I believe all of us are rooting for you. We'd keep you updated about PW. Haha! And if EMCC replies, we'd celebrate via msn. I miss you already. (: See you in like 5 years time? If you're coming back for celeb and stuff, must tell us! I'd make sure I send it to the whole class this time. (:

another well-spent day

Hobbi saya tidur. (My hobby is sleeping)

This is what I saw in my past post.. about year end of 2007. I think this year just flies by too fast. But well, my journey through archives today can be termed-- viewing posts that matter.
Looking through my past posts, especially those year-end thanksgivings to God for bringing me through yet another year, I can still feel my heart fluttering with joy as I remember how He was there at times when I feared, when I grieved, when I rejoiced and everything. I don't even have to reminisce those times, I just know automatically how He was there and everything. I hope that even when I grow old, I will never forget what He has done.
I think that these few days, even though I've not been spending time with God, He still sees and cares. When I thought about the encouragement to my friends a week ago to spend more time with God this holiday, I felt really bad cause' I hadn't been doing it myself. But just everytime when I feel bad, something just tells me 'then move on!' It would be better for me to take action and spend time with Him, than to mope around. Haha.
Thank You Lord for Your faithfulness.. and Your love just never fails.

heartstring

I think I've overanalysed Market Structure..
I could almost burn a hole through it.



Sophia and her buddy (:


Our buddies for our service learning: the heartstrings walk. I can't express how meaningful I felt the whole programme was. Each of us was paired up with a buddy from this organisation that I can't remember what's it called. Before the whole thing, I thought we were chaperoning children. Our buddies are intellectually disabled so I guess all of us were quite nervous because we didn't have prior experience. I think it's quite a new experience.. and I remember when I asked my buddy, Jaafar, if he felt Singapore was big. He replied yes. I don't know, it gave me a new perspective of things? How much we want to venture out.. but sometimes I wish I will not be ambitious (I think I'm less already) because I know I'm here not to build things that do not last. Yup. (:
I hope I brought joy to my buddy. I still remember that we countdown-ed for each other to take turn to hold the umbrella. He knows a bit of Chinese, you know. He'd say, "Xia yu (rain) going to stop."

those moments

HAHAHAHA! I just saw some very funny photos. It's either my night-mode activation (but I didn't drink coffee), or I studied too much, or it's just funny. =D

Who are these ancient people?? =D Taken two years ago only!



God blessed the cell with more more girls! =D




Hahahaha!


I really don't know if they're yawning or what.


















Look at juv's face! =D


And Sam! Hahaha!


On second thought, actually not funny.. I don't even remember why I laughed. But the last one on Samuel was funny. Haha. I miss so many people as I look through those precious photos. If I lost them, I might just start bawling. )=

Have you ever done things so much like a routine, that you miss the whole total purpose of it?

Yes, I have. We all have. I don't know, these few days, I just fear some things.. Fear having to do morning prayer, fear studies.. Fear so many things. I made a prayer this morning that brought peace to my heart. It was like pulling down the trigger and releasing all my fears to God.
It's not that I don't know.. it's just that I have taken granted of the freedom to pray, to communicate with God.

Is there anything difficult for God? When we are feeling helpless in whatever our situations (e.g. for a friend in need), they say, "The best thing you can do is to pray." (: