resist the tormentor

Hmmmmm. Had a good cry out to God yesterday. I felt lifted from all the burdens that I've been throwing into my 'bag'. I can hop now, you see. (:

He never fails.

So I'm starting to put my confidence in Him. Whenever negative thought comes into my mind, I'm going to zap it.
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Thank you teachers for the 'Last Lap' talk. Even though when I heard that word and I just felt like fainting because it's not the last lap of life you're referring to, I was really touched and more motivated. By Mrs Tang's motherly voice, Mr Aw's ever-unique speech, Mr Lim's vision, HuangLaoShi's "mei you za nian" and all the teachers' "We're behind you!" when JM and I turned around just to see Alan behind instead. Haha. Just kidding.

God is great.

Running after You. With this wretched mind of mine.

I was just feeling kinda horrible just now. But sometimes, after a rest, you just laugh at yourself for thinking so much and making your poor brain suffer.

What I should be doing now.
(1) Cut down words that harm others.
(2) Dont let myself be bothered by superficial words
(3) Dont envy people for their results, because God has iven me that very gift
(4) Control my sleep, 9hrs a day is really too much..
(5) Running for the eternal

A note of accountability to my blog and anyone who sees this:

I will study and not slack too much.
I will still continue giving myself enough sleep. (and not oversleep)
I will still laugh for anyone who wants to hear. (i mean, wanjing told me to perfection my laughter =D)
I will keep that peace in my heart.
I will still be cute. (kidding)

There's just one thing I find it quite difficult to commit myself to doing yet.. I will see to it.

I shall just pour out some feelings here. (:

Well, I feel bad for talking so much again. More words that come out of my mouth= More destruction. Like my english, even though Im kinda )= about it, I should be glad because God has really been merciful. I had expression problems with my compo but I still got quite reasonable marks. Who am I to think that I deserve better right.. What is practice if I hadnt applied it in my exam.. And overall, God is still great. =D Actually if we would notice, we have improvements. I guess that matters more than looking at others' results and putting ourselves down.
Had a great time studying with Cherlyn today. Talked alot about future stuff, after O's.. I need to remind myself once again that I do not have to fear even though I still dont know what I want to do in the future. At least I know one thing I want for sure, to be close to God forever.

He crushes my fears.

Thank God for

(1) Results that keep bouncing up and down
(2) My great cell
(3) Brothers and sisters who are seeking God like never before
(4) My great parents
(5) His help which comes so quickly everytime I ask Him! =D
(6) My great friends whom I click so well with (:
(7) Wonderful teachers who are always concern about me
(8) More than anything, that He is my God.

no need to be lost anymore

I've just made an unconstructive post. Man, I should renew my mind.

Romans 12:2 Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

I dont like to be bothered by such things. Things that are basically quite meaningless for one to be troubled by. Sigh.. Actually, there are really things that we will finally realise.. they just cant last. For example, you have had great friends and stuff, but just them being still there doesnt mean things will stay the same. So what's the point of being sad right. Okay, such things can be handed to God. Im glad He's whom I can trust to take care of things.

Today's paper was a bliss. (: I dont really know why, even though yes it was quite difficult, I just feel.. happy. Haha. Perhaps the contrast between the mid-year paper. Mid-year paper was more cell-killing. So anw, Im left with 3 MCQ papers and done!... for Prelims. )= But God has really been so faithful, He gave me all the peace and alertness I needed. So.. Fear not o levels. (:
Took 119 and looped with Cherlyn. We saw this really cute little boy. I mean, yes, I always say that of every kid.. but this time I'll admit.. he's cuter than me. )= Haha! He kept throwing his fury lion bag at us and the way he crack a smile and laugh.. Haha. So we played some 'games' and high-fived. (:::::::: His little palms was like 3 times smaller than mine or smth. I miss being a kid.. And I was thinking. Perhaps when I grow older, I can probably just adopt some kids and they will tag along with me anywhere.

I guess I have to be more flexible.

I was just wondering what I have been doing recently, and whether that was what God has planned for me and stuff. So in my desperation, He answered me. I read this book "The Power of Prayer" which was in the older type of Chinese. Pretty amazing that I figured out 90% of the words.
I'll try to translate the article..
I hope you will grow closer to the Lord, to feel the warmth of His embrace, that He may give you a zhen zi de heart; so that you may know what is His plan for you, and live a confident life; and to further understand what He wants you to become, so that you may walk into His plan.
Okay, the prayer's quite hard to translate. But well, it really showed to me once again that God is so real and He is my Helper! (:
Part of James 4:8 Come near to God and he will come near to you.

When you really feel that you cant do it.. find God. Yup. I realised that there are alot of things that I really cant do on my own. Things like having compassion, study stress and things that are just so out of my control.. etc. I find myself depending on God more and more each day. And.. the best thing is probably Im out of stress mode. I mean, many of us would admit being in E2 can be pretty stressful. (im not saying the rest aint) Just imagine all of us holding on to a stress ball under our desks.. Yep, pretty amusing if you picture it. But it's really great that we're the kinds who play until siao too.. I mean, you dont find another Juvenal elsewhere right. =D
Yup, so anyway, today's Geog. I have no idea why, but even though I have not finished revision, I just felt like charging in and get done with it. =D I think I did pretty okay. I mean, human geog, I know how to crap about you! Haha. I think if I keep up with this atmosphere within me, I will do my O's so much better. (:
I dont really see how I can get pass with life without relying on God more and more.. It's just.. it's great to know that I'm safe in His arms. And I cant wait to taste the food up there! =D

Yesterday, celebrated Huichin's bday. Think she's really happy, cause she's the kinda who can cry from laughter or smth one. Even I, the nicest laughter maker in the world, hardly laugh until cry. )= Haha. Fish & co. is really nice. Nice ambience until we cant even see what food we're eating (dark). Okay, too extreme. Keep taking pictures. See, girls are the kind who take pictures until our fingers go wobbly. Yah, took some really hilarious pics. Almost wanted to emo, but the place, too many people pass by. It doesnt matter, great runaway from books. Pris and I brought our chem out. Haha.
And she looked really funny with the hat and the firework stick on her hand. The fish & co. people do their cheer while we tried to follow miserably.

Even though my mind is still in a whirl, and it's in chaos, at least I know I can cling on to You.

I have a great mummy. =D

how we waste our time

From now on..
Im going to greet Janice using: heyheyzz
And Janice is going to use: yoyozzz
The 'zzz' depends on our mood I guess.
Happy will be zz!
Sad will be zz..
Bored will be zzzz
Going to sleep will be zzzzzzzzzzzz
All caps will either be excited or I-wanna-beat-you-up

Adapted from a 2006 Dec post
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I went back to read my archives. I really need to question myself what I've been doing for the past 16 years. Haha. Janice, how could we have thought of such lame stuff!
And our competition is still pending. Haha! We have not notified Daryl and Ck who's the real winner. To find out more, check for one of the post in the prev Dec.

4E2. Our pride, our joy.

credits to dudley for taking so many wonderful and random pictures.

Yes, this is an edit. I deleted the messages. I came across a material that says "Interesting how one's mouth tempts another into argument and in the process we all become fools. God's way out of that is Proverbs 15:1 "A gentle word turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger." " I guess I will define it as deleting the messages so that my tagboard will not be on fire. Thank you friends for defense.

Anw, thank you 4E2 for yesterday. Had a great time volleyballing until our hands ache like crazy, eating the food that's 1000 times better than canteen food, playing all those games esp the entangling that we failed to solve, soaking in the water until I had to borrow shirt from wash-clothes-k and Juv's fabulous figure that I'd probably never see again. Haha. =D The harshest reality is probably we're back to mugging. But Im looking forward to Christmas! =D
Realised the sky is so beautiful. (:

We lean not on our understanding but on His word. (:

It is through trials that I realise my own weaknesses.
I want to walk with Your strength.