Just a quick post. I realised that many things that I've advised to people, I have not done much the same too. I guess it's really true, that faith and action must go hand in hand. I hope I'd just stop being so oblivious to what I want to do. And God has made it very oblivious to me that I wont do things as well if I dont place my trust in Him. I just want to stop doubting, stop fearing and start glorifying God with my studies.

I dreamt of choir. )= Dreamt of mr liew, his scoldings, choir buddies. Man, I miss them.
Pastor prayed for our exams. Could feel a sense of peace. Had been having fears of MYE. I really want to start mugging. God, please help me have the discipline.
After service, went to Joyce's school concert. Their place is like magnificent lar. I could see God's works in the building. The old building and the new one.. Big difference. And I kept wondering if that was even a school! The concert hall is so much like the style of some JCs' auditorium. So cool.



Just a small view. Anyway, their performing arts is really good. Esp Handbells, not that I want to flatter Joyce, but I cant imagine how they coordinate with all the foot stamping and stuff. Overall, Im glad I went.


I want to be refreshed.

I dont really know what to say. Everyday just seems to be a battle, Im like waging a war. Sometimes I see myself getting bruised badly, but I also see myself trying to get up again and carry on the fight. After all, my Dad has won the war for me. What matters is if I wanted to claim the prize. And even though I still feel doubtful about whether Im exactly walking out of this, I tell myself that I am so going to believe that I will be out of it. And I see my fellow mates down and broken. I cant do anything to help but pray and learn to put my trust in Him. Daddy's going to back us up. We'd stumble, but we wont fall.
I need my armour so much.

Finding solace in You.

I can use these pictures to relate how I feel now.


Im going to scare the devil off with God's truth.


God will never dump me, neither will I dump him.


And when the devil points accusations at me, I'd point back!


Eventually I'd find light back. (:

The end of the comic strip. Haha.

counting joys

Hello! =D Well, these few days have been going on pretty well for me. I feel much happier. (:

Joy (1) Im so glad that God is with me.
Joy (2) Mum has been cooking alot recently. I look forward to coming home everyday!
Joy (3) I love my dearest babes! They're such delights!
Joy (4) I think I did well for my Chinese Oral! Doesnt matter how much I get, Im happy. (:
Joy (5) Open book test for Geog today! Crazy surprise!

Had a crazy time w babes yesterday. We were actually doing smth for Cher's art coursework and took tons of pics. Okay, out of the snapshots, I think only one-fifth depicts the real us. The rest are crap. But funny! Haha. This is going to be one of my deepest memories of my sec sch life. I ever wondered how am I going to find people like these crazy asses who can complement w me.

I'd just upload 3 of these pics.


We can be toot.

We can be ourselves.

And.. I love my curry puff hairstyle. It's gone)=

No Dumping!

Credits to Cherlyn. (: You may view the rest in her blog.
And credits to Dud's cam (his cam, not him. =D) for the pic I cherish most.

I think Im getting my pacing right already. Okay, for today. I hope this will continue. My bad habit is that when people go fast, I want to chase along, knowing that that's not my pacing. I forgot that I will catch up eventually.
And after reading Charis' post, I realised that all I had been feeling had been "Why this, why that." But I forgot that.. thank God for everything, thank God especially for the Silver. We've worked hard for it. (:
I finally stopped screwing up for my Chem practical. Guess how difficult it was. Haha. I kept making sure that my burette clamp works alright or this time it'd be purple liquid splashing all over me.
Peer tutors met up today. Malcolm (Mr Lim's son) came along after that. He is such a delight! Keeps dancing around and shaking his butt! =D I realised that kids can really change people. Mr Lim started showcasing his son's talents and go googoogahgah with him. So cute lar! But he got Hazimah into real fright whenever he starts screaming. =D
I am feeling sick and tired already. When was the last time since I fell sick. Note sarcasm. )=
Needs: Slow to anger, patience, grace or in short, heart of love.

I want to get confidence from You, not anything else. (:

It feels weird not having practices anymore. Nevertheless, cell bonding was fun! (: Played charades which got all of us laughing like crazy. Haha. And well, I think those evaluating and reflecting on the cell's progress was really good. It got me into thinking. I want to learn to contribute to the cell instead of always coming just to share my struggles. Haha. Yup. I think I hadnt been sharing much on how God has helped me. And also, I think I should bond with and encourage ppl more.
I have no idea how I got thr these few crappy times. Im still pulling myself thr and I hope I'd just be able to get myself settled down and be contented with what I have. I know I failed my Emaths because of the careless mistake. I know how to do, so I should stop pinning myself down. Yup.
I came across the song sheet that we had for worship.. The words there really struck my heart as I relate to what Im feeling now.

Things in the past, things yet unseen,
Wishes and dreams that are yet to come true
All of my hopes, all of my plans,
My heart and my hands are lifted to You.

I commit myself to You once again. Im sorry Lord that I had relied on myself.

The joy and the pain Im making them Yours.

James 1:2-3 Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.

To my dearest friends: Continue learning and living in the truth of God. Dont be controlled by your emotions or believe in the devil's lies. Live in His truth.

nv chorale

I have this great urge to blog. Haha. Because yesterday was such a blast! =DDD I miss choir already. I miss Mr Liew. I miss practices. I miss the stand. I miss Sylvia. I miss my dearest juniors! They cried because we were leaving lar! I never knew the seniors and juniors love (we still do) each other so much! All of us cry until so cham. And we had our last hugs w Mr Liew. )= It's so unbearable to let go. I have been treating him like a semi-daddy already.

Starting from the start, some of us went for lunch and Charis and I had a disgusting photo that I'd like to show. Haha!

Haha! If Bryan saw this he'd say "Can you guys stop being so obscene?"

And another.


Back in school, went for the prize-presentation w Jassy. We kept disturbing each other. And it was very boring there. I couldnt keep still, kept thinking of how much I'd rather to join the choir. It's afterall my last practice. How dare they rob the time of my last combined. Haha.
I think our performance was really great. I kept thinking of the start of my first performance in sec1 and now. Our first song (in sec 1) started with the word 'climb' and our last song (sec4) ended with 'more'. In conclusion, 'climb more'. I just to tell my dearest juniors this. Dont go back to square one. Continue to improve and excel. Dont jump down the cliff then climb up again. Climb higher! =D I really love the audience's response during Janger. Haha. And the applause was.. amplified in my ears. =D
After performance, everyone were =D. But after that became the emo part. All the girls seniors cried like nobody's business. I knew this was going to happen. Shaakirah kept telling me "I shouldnt have been so close to you!" Haha. I love her alot lar. I miss blasting our voices. And my dearest Sylvia. You have to move those stands and stuff on your own now. )= My heart will like definitely be w you. =D My dearest juniors. Even though we're always scolding you guys, we still love you like crazy asses. Next time we come back, you'd become seniors! =D And Mr Liew, dont leave the choir and Singapore or we dont know how to find you! Haha. I miss everyone!
And yes, results doesnt matter to me anymore. What's more impt is definitely the bond we share.


Shaakirah and Esther (:


Logistic mates =D




My dearest Alto mate!


My dearest A-li!


Alto mates! (:


Weichiat and me (: He told me "Must come back" and I was like, wow. Juniors can be so sweet!


Donny!


Waiihoong, me and chuilaam


Dudleyyyy.


Jialer.


Jesslyn.


Ruihan.





The black face series. I forgot to switch to night mode. (:



I had to hypnotise Mr Rashidin that this is not a cam phone.


Charlton.


Crazy bunch having pizza feast


Chuilaam wants to eat my hand. )=





Ending off with the picture I cherish most. (:


Moving on.

I'm feeling negative cum positive and people are so positive. I really dont understand how they do it.

Choir has gotten a silver. I'm really proud of ourselves. We've went thr instructor's torturing, countless practices, some nonsense and honey drinks. Haha. I think we've done our best, so we dont have to regret or what. (: It was like first time being there for results, so it was new experience. Went it and they intro the adjudicators. And I thought Ko Matsushita was an old grandpa but he's actually young and looks like Adrain Pang. And another one from China looked like our Chinese teacher! =D And it was sad cause' it's my last SYF and I think we really deserved more than that. Still, Mr Liew had said that we should be contented with what we have or smth like that. Yup.
And tml is our last day performing tgther. I think I will cry like mad or smth. Cause' I'd like miss Mr Liew, seniors and juniors, Sylvia my beloved Logistic partner, the keyboards and the conductor stand. And Im worried about Choir's male population survival cause some guys say they're going to quit after SYF. Very sad lar. All these while, everyone has been emotinally attached to Choir and I dont know how they'd bear to leave actually. And I really hope to be able to go for the tour at end of year. =D
Overall, we have really done well and Im learning to be positive. I know Im having a hard time trying not to rely on my own understanding and trust in God. But well, I did it yeah. 1001 things went thr my mind when we were performing, for example (1) energy (2) current (3) timing (4) feeling (5) ribcage lifted up (6) the practices that we had (7) teamwork (8) i will be fine (9) accent (10) crescendo. You see, I was like in the tenors' territory and Im really glad I didnt go out of tune or what. Yup, Im happy. (:
Anyway, the co-ordinates I mentioned in my prev post is correct! Im amazed. But I still failed.

No use. Even if we get Gold or what I will still find smth to be sad about. Even if I get full marks for a test or exam I will still find smth to be sad about. I need time to get out of this mindset.

Praise Him- because I dont have to worry.

I've been relying alot on talking to people. It feels nice to talk to ppl about things, life, anything. Which is not really good.. with the word relying. Sometimes I get so down that I dont feel like doing anything w/o someone to talk to, someone I want to talk to.
Anyway, NAPFA nightmare's over. Timing of 14:00. Which is good compared to all my timings. But Im taking my standing broad jump again, I think. I seriously need springs installed on my legs.
I think what I've written in this piece of paper makes sense. Putting in hardwork doesnt fully guarantee that you will attain success. But it makes you a winner in terms of mentality, and doing your best in everything just wont make you regret, at all. This is what I've learnt from my Amaths and Physics test. I worked hard, yes, but I know Im going to fail my Amaths cause from Qn 1 to the rest I was totally clueless about what I was doing. Have you ever seen co-ordinates of (225, 1.37) before? But well, even though I know Mr Aw will puke over my ans, at least I tried. I didnt leave blanks. So that's worth celebrating. Yay. (: And actually, what Ms Chen said is upsetting and true. I wanna try to quieten down and get serious. Erm, Looyee= serious doesnt really complements yeah. But.. whatever.
Im so determined to make tomorrow better. Stop all those thoughts of 'what am i doing here' and crying all the time. Haha. How silly. It's the attitude that keeps the going running, I guess.
Cath High has gotten Gold w Honours. Actually Im confident that we'd do well, and I dont ever want what Mr Liew says about going up and down each practice. We're going to go up and up until the judges encore! =D Haha.
I want to learn to use the strength You provide me with. Teach me how.

2 days to SYF, 3 days to speech day, 4 days to cell bonding =D

Im elated and surprised by some people. They always seem like they dont care about smth and actually deep down, they do treasure it.
Sometimes I really wonder if Im getting superficial..
Granny's not well. She's been transferred from nursing home to hosp. I dont know what to do but to hand it to God and I wanna commit to praying for her health and salvation. Hadnt been regular w my prayers recently.

Anw, I'd really like to thank some buddies and monsters for encouragement and your prayers. (: It means so much to me.

Im putting faith in God that everything will go well. (:
Heading off to do hwk. There's this Eng assg on 'why you are an unique indvl and how do you best express yourself'. It's a headache cause I tend to think alot and sidetrack. Haha.

A generation that seeks Your face.

Muscle ache all over! )::::: And my juniors still have the cheek to laugh at me when I stretch down for my bag cause it's a torture to try to sit.
Choir early in the morning. Prepared honey water for choir w ChuiLamm and Huichin. Think we really chi bao mei shi zuo. But well, it's just a gesture to let the choir know that they've really worked hard. Yangling helped us buy lunch. =D Well, I hate to say this but I think Altos should like seriously work harder. Wrong notes, wrong counting, volume. It's okay if it's for a few only, but it's like almost whole sectional never sing some parts. Which gets some of us seniors really annoyed. But I think after what Mr Liew said today that Altos was good, and I was really surprised, I think they do put in good effort. But well, let's not be complacent and work harder. We have the calibre to do even better. =D Mr Liew's 'speech' today got me into strong agreement. As in, we know we work our very best and that's fine already. Doesnt matter about the achievement, as long as we dont shortchange ourselves. Yup.
Just something to share w everyone. (: Pastor talked about how the eagle's nest is built. The mother eagle will gather twigs, thorns and stones to make the base, then put feathers on top so that it'd be comfortable for its baby eagles. And when they grow older, the mother eagle will pull away the feathers so that they will leave. We're meant to be like eagles and sometimes we forget about it and stay in our comfort zone. Moral of the story, you decide it yourself.

I cant deny that He is working in my life every now and then. (:
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Pictures =D

Ju.C and I got hold of Charis phone and started to take some interesting pictures of nature that she can put on her wallpaper. Haha!


Wow, pretty. Haha!

And some of us girls got really bored and starting taking wacky pics.

Some girl seniors. (:



Imagine we're going to be future air stewardesses. =D Ppl will be scared off.

And we tried to act like Mr Liew.

His usual conducting, w abit of exaggeration. (:


Torturing his target, once again. =D


Throwing chairs at poor singers.


And his sexy Hello Kitty bottle. =D

This is going to hurt your eye. You're currently viewing gay shots.

(1) Wearing 'scarf' which is actually the cover for the piano keys. Haha.
(2) Taking picture with his digimon. Apparently, it's too small to be seen. =D

Compare this

With this

Okay, it's obvious Im just posing. (:


And we found water on the mat, so we acted like it was Crystal's drool. (:

Another pic of insp. It's blur cause I took a picture of the picture. Haha.