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My finance! =D


Dudley! =D


Haozhi when he was Sec 1. =D Those use-bowl-cut-hair hairstyle.

Our last year to celebrate Jassy's birthday, if unfortunate enough. )=

Jassy and Ju.C


Me and Jassy.

Debate (photos credit to Crystal)

Me, JM the burper and Hoekin, the one who laughs in "tsktsk"


Crystal, she looks really to punch someone. Haha.


Oh, and the oh so lovely Looma. =D Haha. You may puke now. (:
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I hate breaking down in front of people. It makes you feel weak. But these days, seems like everything's just pressing down so much, all the struggles within the heart and stuff. It's just too uncontrollable.
Anyway, 2 out of 6 tests down. (: But I dont think I did well for Geog. Mind couldnt focus. I need sleep. Alot of it, in fact. I plan to read Chinese newspaper from start of March. I want an A for Chinese so that I may kick this subj off very soon. Hard to achieve but yeah, I'll do the best I can.

Happy Birthday Cher! (:

*I'll be doing it all because I love You.

I must remember that my time is in God's hand. He will make everything go right. Thank You Lord! (:

Sat
Watched VI and Crystal won! (: And had choir. We did smth new today. Tenors behind sop and basses behind altos. It's great to hear the bass from the front. Their voices BOOM into your ears. Haha. Then we switched and stuff. Looking forward to camp. It's gonna be some sort of intensive voice training. Yay.
Debate was great. My rebuttals are getting better and I no longer feel like Im lousy or what cause' all of us are moving at same speed and stuff. Stef has been really nice to me since the start of this whole thing. Fun stuffs happened. Haha. I really love debate mates. We crack each other up. =D
Church was really different. I felt so much of God's presence during worship. And cell atmosphere was abit tensed. At first we had much fun playing icebreakers but when we started discussing, could feel that everyone feels disappointed w themselves or smth. But still, to cell: Continue to be zestful for the Lord! We're gonna achieve what we aimed for! And i seriously cant wait for mission trip. (: By then O levels would have been over. =DDDDDDD
Dined w babes after that at pastamania. It's great there. I didnt know they dont charge for service. Haha. I love the dim atmosphere and juv caught some great shots. Will post soon. (: Neoprints after that. Pretty gay lar, since I hadnt take neoprints for tons of years. But still, anything w em is fun. To cher, sorry if your bday present is going to be belated. I will try to rush though.
Today
Went to visit Smarties in TTSH w Joyce and Kaiwei. That place really brought alot of sad memories. Anw I really hesitated whether to visit or not but God spoke to me to, you know, serve others, think for others before yourself. And yeah, so I went w a cheerful heart. (: Smarties told us that he fell on the drain cover. Say ouch. So he's gonna have op tml and will miss some of the common test, since he hurt his right hand. Haha. I told him that I could train his left hand. Haha. Anw, just hope that the op will be smooth and he'd get well really really soon! (:

And because of all these, I have not revised for my Geog and tons of stuff are not done yet! Roar. There's still field trips, sectionals, and not to mention visiting. This seems to be the season to really help, encourage, surprise and serve others. Nevertheless, things will be busy but I will try to do my best in everything for God and also keep a positive and cheerful attitude. (:

I woke up at 7am today. Say "wow". Im glad that I no longer flare up w my dad cause' in the past, I would get angry and sufrghfgu cause' of just-woke-up syndrome. Haha. Anyway, it was also my fault cause I off the alarm and told myself Dad would wake me up. In the end both of us slept. =D Haha. Anw, please pray that I'd sleep well. Have been having "subconcious sleep" recently. No idea why.
Aly and I had eraser fight today. Haha. I think we should have more of those weird games going on to perk ourselves up. And did I mention? PE next week! =DDDDD Class missed PE for the week cause of CNY. )= Didnt go for heats because (1) It's stupid to wait for just one event. (2) Not enough ppl. One had tuition, another had smth on. Just hope cher' wont scold.
Dinner w babes tml! =D Crystal's blog mentioned how Sats are so packed. I wholeheartedly agree! (: Anw girl, I'd keep you in prayer. (:
Bye people, monsters, kidfaces, emperors, whoevers.

GOODLUCK NEXT WEEK! (::::::::::::::::::::::

I seriously need someone to use a loud hailer and yell to me: WAKE UP! YOU'RE NOT TIRED (and) YOU'RE TIRED (at appropriate times)

I feel so so tired. Perhaps my mindset's too wrong that I tell myself everytime, "You dont have anymore strength lar. So stressed." and actually life is just about the same as anyone else. So from now on, I shall keep telling myself, "You still have tons of energy! You're just getting started dude!" and at the back to my head will come a little voice saying, "Yeah right."

Okay, Im so wrong. My thinkings are sending me off to killing-yourself-mentally land.

Survive through. And study now. Stop hogging at this comp. It'd do you no good. Okay, bye.

*The storm seems imminent, and so does the rainbow.

one last song

To myself: Sometimes when you are in a dilemma whether people are right or wrong, dont judge then. Judging isnt your job, it's God's. Cause' only He knows the situation. Sometimes you think you know what's going on but there's always teeny weeny details that changes the whole story. In conclusion, dont bother judging cause (1) It's not your job (and you wont do a good job doing it either) and (2) You're tired enough to think about all these. (:

Anyway, today's lessons have been less strenous. Haha. Mr Lim suggested a good way to prepare rebuttals. In fact, he told me that after my breakdown, my voice sounded hoarse and I was stuttering. I seriously didnt know about the hoarse part. But still, I managed thr it right. Praise the Lord! (: 9/3/2007. Goodluck to debate team! =D Hope we get into semi-finals.

I dont feel like talking about the rest of CNY. But in between, we went to visit Grandma at nursing home and she's doing pretty well. Hope her leg will heal and get home soon! (: I mean it, I really hope to mend this broken relationship. And this old lady asked my mum and I to pray for her! We were pretty surprised and well, she has strong faith! (:

We celebrated Jassy's bday today. (: Ate at pizza hut and I finally ate my long-awaited lasagne! (::::: Bought a cake for her too. (: Juv and I sang quite loud. Haha. (: Took pics and blahblah. This year must celebrate all the babes' bday. Afterall, it's our last year. )=

Just a moment of privacy here. Nothing has started or ended. Im sorry for the way things are and it's really difficult to even communicate. Well, whether we talk or not, I still treat you as a classmate/friend. Yup. That's all. Things can really be simple if you want them to be. (:

song of joy

Ran w joyce today. She saved a cat off the tree. And it was pregnant somemore. I find that cats are really timid. It really felt like the cat was silly from human's point of view. Someone's there to save it but yet it just hanged on to the branches tightly w/o letting go. And things ended well after it's safe. It must have thought like this, "It's not that scary after all." But sometimes human have little courage, just like that cat.
Went to grandma's house after church. People were all the same. Never seem to change except us kids. Talked to aunt about my spiritual growth and went to corridor w/ cousin. Had a very nice and fruitful talk w her. After all, we hardly get to catch up on each other. She's currently in Meridian JC. (: Time flies so fast. I still can remember the time when one of my uncle was getting married, and both of us were so small back then. Hope we'd continue to keep in touch when we get older.
More visitations tml. Im planning to run alone arnd the area. Not the park, it's too boring. (:

The joy of freedom, it's yet redeemed.

standing up, once again.

It's just too loud inside my heart to hear You. I hope it'd eventually calm down. And Im sorry for hurting You so much. And I still dont really know what to do. But thank You because You'd take care of it all.

Let's think of happy stuff. Once again.

I took so long to get up on the ball. Haha. (:

Sam the shit faces.

Yay. (:

Sam took this. He always slants the pic.

Me and ChuiLaam (:

Me and Shaakirah. Thanks for teaching me Malay. Haha.


JM. (:

Char, me and juv. And three monsters behind us. Note Aly.

Another of my sky collection. Light breaking thr. (:

Dud and Hz. Note below. They pull their shirt down until cant see their pants. Sick alr. Haha. (:

Jogging w Joyce tml, then church. (: It's gonna be fun. Imagine two monsters running during CNY.

Jm's party was nice. (: To her: Even though I said I didnt feel like going, the thing turned out nice still. With the presence of God. (: Anyway, just an early Happy Birthday to you and keep going with God's love and strength. (:

We celebrated at xq's and I think Char and I thought of the same stuff during the first half of the party. Haha. But things were fine. And I love the cake! It's super nice and note: I never liked cakes this much before. (: Haha. That time when we had cell dinner and they made me eat the cake, I wanted to faint or smth. Haha. Anw we had alot of fun. I fanned Sam and the bbq thing until I wanna faint, Jasmine Lee got saved by Daryl frm the 'waterfall', we all played alotalotalot. Cake fight, whipped cream fight and satay sauce fight. Some of us seriously hate the smell of whipped cream. By the end of the day, I felt that I smelt of vomit. Haha. Like someone just puked all over me or smth. Iris got all the peanut on her hair. =D And we went to the 'lagoon' (as they call it) and they threw the pebbles in front of us so that we'd get wet. But anyway, the thing that I think I love most was the worshipping part. Some of them got started singing worship songs and I joined in. Felt that it was really great. But sometimes I feel that my main attention wasnt on God but my passion for music. Still, I will continue to learn to listen and wait upon Him. Most imptly, to keep my fire for God going. =D

Im like kinda glad Im not the only one who feels that way. =D

We got back geog results. Pretty okay, since I do last min mugging all the time. I'm starting to learn to surrender my studies to God. As in dont get so uptight about results and all this. (: Just be the best I can be. Yay.
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It's not a religion, it's a relationship. Coming before Him just as you are, imperfect. Where you cast your burdens and cares to Him, to the King of kings. It's about trusting Him in everything that you do, in everything that you ask of Him. Trusting your life with Him, cause He wants the best for you. And most importantly, loving Him for He is love. There has never been anyone there for you 24/7. Will you allow Him to be your 24/7 God?

I have so much to update on! Continuing from previous post, we won the debate! Oh man.. the feeling is super renewing. It's like once in a while you think about it again, the sweet feeling of victory just rushes back. =D I didnt do that well but it was all by God's grace that I got through the whole thing! We got the abjudicator to comment about our debate and he commented speaker by speaker. The good thing: He said that my elaboration and stuff were good. (: The bad thing: Stef said that my rebuttals weren't that well. Yeah I know it. I spoke all in one-liners and actually got through it because of crystal's cue cards. Haha. She stuff the cue cards to me and I read it all out. I can like seriously faint if I was w/o her at that point of time. I analysed the reason behind my weakness. Hopefully I'd be able to train myself better to handle rebuttals and Stef will see a new me for the next training. (: Goodluck for other rounds! I yearn so much for confidence.
I did QT today and it was rewarding. I learnt so much from it, it satisfied one of my doubts. I have been wondering alot about my life.. About how I have portrayed myself as a victor in Christ. I'm flawed and I thank God for forgiving me for all I've done and I pray that He'd erase all the guilt I feel because He has already forgiven me. QT was about how people in the Bible experienced frustration, struggle in their sins and disappointment. They ended up victorious and confident in Christ. It gave me an assurance that yes, I will be entirely changed in Him. (:

Im learning hard. Learning to be slow to anger, learning to have respect for every single soul, learning to be more like You.

My time is in Your hands.
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The key is to trust that God is who He says He is and to place all your confidence in Him. You must believe that He will handle every situation with an unbelievable amount of care and concern. Sometimes His ways are beyond our understanding, but never forget that ultimately they are always good. -NotReligion Insights

Im sorry for showing my mood to people these few days. I know my mood's been crappy. I'm either hyper or I get really crappy and it's not for no reasons. There's alot of reasons for my moods. Sometimes it's the stress that I feel and I just wonder why I have to go through all these. Why did I choose to go for debate, thimun and stuff? Why cant I just learn to be a student who studies and that's all? And sometimes when I get really quiet in the morning when I reach school, it's because Im simply enjoying the serene within my heart at that point of time. There was this need to quieten down. And at times when I go really crazy, that's probably my usual self or sometimes, Im just escaping from all the rahrah stuffs for a little while. I will try not to show my mood if you guys dont like it. I mean if it's me, I wont like it either. Still, sorry people.
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That was a good analysis of my emotions. Like what Wendy has been telling me in the past, dont let my emotions control me. I'll really try. (:
I really hate this life somehow. Sometimes like and sometimes hate. I wish I could just go through the routine of a human without any climaxes in my life. But I have always want to live a life that's different, that has impacts to it. But now Im getting tired. I did my QT and it talked about spiritual exhaustion. Doing service for God. But what am I doing now? Im serving work and more work instead. Im so tired. And I really wish to pull out of debate. But I cant bear to. Maybe if I really cant stand it, I will. But for today, it's a commitment Im making and Im not gonna back out last minute. There's just so many things I wanna do but dont dare to. And so many things I dont want to do but cant bear to let go. Am I really enjoying? Yes, there's all the satisfaction after a speech is made. But what do I really want.
We've seen people getting their O levels result today. It felt like Im gonna be there next year and when Im there.. would I be part of the smiling ones or the crying ones.

Sometimes life gets so hard to get on with whatever you're doing. I guess I have to really have more confidence and yeah, trust the Lord and lean not on my own understanding.

Goodluck later. I can do it! (:

It's a deep and committed relationship with the everlasting God. -NotReligion Insights
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I felt so frustrated thinking all these stuffs I have on hand. But the feeling eased once I thought of what God has told me- to hand it to Him.
My fever has gone down! =D It's 36.6 now! Praise the Lord! =D The big problem is I still feel like my brain is rolling or something. Haha! I have no idea why. And for the first time since ten thousand years ago, I stayed at home all the while. Not to mug, of course. Mainly spent time sleeping. =D This must have been my happiest weekend.
I finished watching the vcd I was talking about in my previous post. It's so super sad. )=

Ok, I know this is a boring post. Better ones up soon, perhaps.

*Your sovereignty.

I've been sleeping alot today. That's the excuse for a sick person. (: But the sad thing was Im going to miss service. )= And I might not even have a single clue what happened during debate training. Sigh. Well, it's better to rest at home and recover than go out then get even more sick. Herherx.

Actually this post is just to tell my friends how much I miss going out with them. )=

And Im still in the drifting mood. Somehow whenever I get sick, I just dont feel like doing anything.

Know Jesus--His life, His power, His promises. Focus. Keep your attention on Jesus and decide to love, follow and respond to Him no matter what. -NotReligion Insights.
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To many, esp JM: Sorry that I took my frustration on you guys.

I have no idea how I survived through today. Have been getting sick often nowadays. Somehow, Im glad that Im going to drop out of VI. It's like finding more trouble to do when you have enough on hand now. And I must concentrate on studies now. I have just set a rule for myself to watch less of TV.
Just came back from Doc. 39 degrees Celsius. Dad talked to me about putting too much stress on myself.. And even though I so much want to spend my Sat at home recuperating, I feel the obligation to go for choir and debate. Let's just pray that I will be fine tomorrow.
And the motion for our debate is out! =D We're competing against Yuying Sec and the topic is somewhat related to what we have done during debate training.

Bryan: change.. confess to the Lord abt it.. and commit to changing
Me: I will try my best! =D

*Drifting away. But I'd be back.

pictures time! (:

Dudley, my gong nu. (:



Ba ni gan diao. =D



Monsters acting serious. They failed miserably. (:



Biscuit in her mouth. Yay! Disgusting (:



They are two 16-year-olds, mind you.


From left: Sis (Maomaomao) and Mother (ah mu) =D



Taking pictures like some retards at yoshi. Herherx.

Compliments to Crystal.

Ju.C and me (:





I know it's gay. Haha. Just memories. (:



7 dwarfs. And Mr Lim is our snow white. =D

Im supposed to be busy doing my work and stuff but Im right here blogging. I deserve some slapping. Haha. We had three tests in a row today. Hist, then Emaths and Chinese. For the whole half of our day. I wonder how we survived. So currently, there's like 4 test results not out yet. And a stream of Chinese tests will be coming our way too. Like rah.. I wish we could do home economics like lower sec. Cook and burn the school. =D
Pardon me for grieving here everytime. I know I've said before but let me say again.. Why cant I just have my 5-day school? I have enough last year and this year seems to get worse. Seriously I cant wait for Olevels. That's when all these SYF and debate mama thing stop for real.
Anyway, I have been watching this vcd called A Litre of Tears. It's like drama serial but based on a true story of this girl. Her small brain got some problem and she cant walk properly, can talk, cant do alot of things. And the disease has no cure. Super sad lar. The plot's really good.

To myself: You decided to do all these, so carry on. You feel tired right, so dont stress yourself or you'd get more tired.