The answer to the direction will be as clear as daylight at the right time. Patience.....

It took me this long to realise that I'm really schooling. Only when the lecturer announced there's a test coming up. Like wow. Test, that's a foreign word. I feel ashamed to say I'm going to have some fun first. Hee. Sorry test, you just have to go to the back of my mind now. (It would be better if you leave.) Off you go.
So tomorrow...? I need quiet and peace right now. Ciao.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight. Prov 3:5-6
This verse has been sticking on the big walls of the cc and I took now to be reminded by it.

Every blessing You pour out I'll turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in Lord, still I will say
Blessed be Your name.

Dorita and I are going to take a leap of faith to join dance for LIFE concert organised by SAJC. It's free admission to all and I truly hope my friends will come.. I'll let you guys know really soon. (: So you must come and support me, even if I fall down the stage you must tell people around you proudly, "Hey that one my friend leh." =D
I'm quite determined not to be passive in this school, but be active as I somewhat was in NV. I guess opportunities used to come to me but now, it's time for me to grab it. (: But well, not overly else my grades suffer. Herherx.
Well.. just a thought to share. Sometimes we talk about how we can't hear God speaking to us right. Sometimes it's just that we quite ignore it because we don't quite wanna hear it. We need to dig down into our hearts to know.. That's what happened since the time when I was making some decisions. Like now.. CCA. I'm still praying.. for wisdom and also willingness to do what He wills. Yup, I just want to make the right choice by allowing God to be in everything.
Btw, I just realised that I've been wasting quite a deal of time. Haven't we? Just think about what you do everyday. For e.g, waiting for the next lesson that starts 4 hours later. I can't help wondering if the person who set the timetable was in the right mind, but well, we can do so much just during the waiting. Motivation, please come.

even though the journey's long

Cherlyn's online shop

Just click the link, you know you want to. Haha. Go and buy some clothes inside. She might be the next top designer so next time you can ask for a discount by saying passionately, "I bought your clothes in the first ever shop you opened." She might be moved to tears and give you the clothes for free. You never know. (;

I love weekends.... But I will still continue to trust in God. Wait till the day I say I love going to school. (:
Well, friday was quite an awakening call to me. Introductory lectures once again, and I was not even sleeping. During history, I felt the busyness feeling coming up. Lecturer told us that notes will give us just a D, so we had to do the readings. As he droned on, my brain started to think about how I have to go to the library and get the 2-hour loan book then spend the rest of my life in there. The thought of it gives me the chills, it's like terminating my social life or what. But well, it's true that my priority there is supposed to be studying right. Good thing, there is another alternative that will help more. I'm asking God to help me with stress management. I'm not going to allow the word 'busy' to fill up my life.
Assurance reminder: He will definitely be there for me through it all.
Had a meet up with my three cutie pies. Congrats to Juv for being back to SAJC! (: I definitely miss them. When I saw Cherlyn, just couldn't hold back that hug. Haha.
But again, thank God for my OG. There are people there where I can talk like crazy. And there's this girl that reminds me of Hu-hu-da-da. We had an outing and 10 out of 30 came. Haha! Think we're going to get into our CG soon. (:

JASMINE CHI

This post is dedicated to Jasmine Chi aka Xiao Chi.

Another sexy seventeen! (; I'll just write a short message here. There'd be more in the letter which I've not written yet. Hee.
The girl who sits in front of me in Sec1. =D I miss kicking your chair. Haha. And I love the 161 rides that we have, when we'd sit down at the compass bus stop outside and talk all the wayyyy long. (: Amazing that even though we're in same class only for ONE year, we've been really good friends for FOUR! =D I miss swinging, watching the horrible horror movies with you and co. (: Thank you for being a great friend. All the best for your new life in Poly. Don't be too busy until we can't meet up! Haha.




The wonderful cookie chefs!


Karaoke babes. (:

thoughts purified

I don't know what to say but well, I am really blessed.

Orientation. It was quite difficult for me to get to school. Right at the road, I was tearing and struggling whether to go home or not. If you were at the scene, you would have thought I was acting in drama serial. And somehow, when I looked up at the pitch dark sky, I knew God was with me. So sweet, the presence. So I told myself: Go, you know you want to go for worship. We sang 'Above All' and 'Still'. I was going crazy. He knew me. My beloved Father was telling me, why are you afraid of man. I think of you, above all things. I told Him, I will be still and know You are God. The person leading worship was saying, things change, environment change. One thing that never changes is God. Amen to that.

I'm back to OG3 but there were only three familiar faces. We played some games but the atmosphere was quite slack. Then we started playing 'duck duck goose'. My partner and I kenna so we chased after the other pair. I was probably dragging my partner after me. And when we came to a stop, "piang!" And she was like, "You okay anot?" And I went, "Yah, just a little pain." And the next thing, the side of my forehead was bleeding without me knowing it until she told me. Wow. Basically the blood was flowing all the way down and we ran to the washroom to wash it. I wasn't crying, I was in between smiles and laughter. No idea why actually. Then Juv's ex-OGL helped me with the antiseptic. Sweet. Well, I still felt blessed. I was so glad that it wasn't like I broke a bone or what. And the cut was quite deep, but short. And it was near the eyebrow so even if there's a scar, it doesn't matter. I'm not going to be a model or what. But I'm still praying that it won't leave a scar or what. Back to my OG. It's filled with people who seemed to have very different characteristic. And most of them were from 2nd intake. The one I bumped into was very sweet, a chinese-jap girl. I started telling her I was pretty in jap. Haha! (:

When I got home, I just thought about why it took me quite long to get used to the environment. SA is a really friendly school. So what was the problem. Sometimes when I looked over at NV, I'd tear a little. It was during devotion today that I got the answer, even though I felt it didn't matter much to know the reason or not. I was reading the explanation of a verse and it told me, do not be surprised if God places you in an environment that isn't secure or familiar.. Ta-da. The answer. I was too used to my familiar environment. I don't know why, but I find it as though I was engaging in an active conversation with God, which was true.
This morning, Mum prayed for me and Dad walked to mrt station with me. I feel really blessed for such loving parents. That they knew that my mind was a battlefield and that they just wanted to encourage me as much as they could.

LIU JIAMIN

This post is proudly dedicated to Liu Jiamin.


Happy sexy seventeen! They do rhyme huh. (;

I'm going to write a history account of what I remember about you.
I remember I got to know you in Bintan and not Singapore.. Haha. When we were on our way for Sec 3 camp and I'm pleasantly surprised that you remember the awkward conversation that we had on the jerky, non-aircon bus. And I have no idea why we started talking about church or something. It's amazing, how that topic became our conversation. And I thought you were quite 'dao' then. Haha.
She then brought me to FOP and I think it was quite what led me back to church and that's how I became what I am now, growing in faith. (And not forgetting cuteness. Just kidding) Thanks sister. (:
Then there were the debates and THIMUN conferences. I can't quite remember what happened then, but I know that it was through these things that we got to know each other better.

And thank you that everytime I needed a phone buddy, you will just be there to listen to me drone on and on.
We really have to admit that we are actually quite different, in a way that I can't quite put a word to it. Amazing how we can connect sometimes. Well, I believe it's the bond that Jesus has binded us together that makes it special to have a friend like you. (:



May you have a really blessed birthday. (:

the year so far

Life has never been boring. I don't know if it's good or bad but well, I'm alive still..

God knows. He knows it when I made my decision to speak the truth when my PE teacher asked why we did not come. He knows it when I turned back and whimpered every time the struggle comes to do right. I don't know why, but today I'm especially filled with thoughts. I'm glad that I'm weak. Because that's how He gets to work within me, and gives me strength, also revealing more of Himself to me. I'm glad that problems come and I know He is still there with me. Even when I did not humble myself to ask Him for help, He was patient and understanding as He sees me try with my own might. I find myself running back to Him.. we knew I needed Him.
But it's time for me to seek Him at once inside of taking the loop.

It takes us quite a while in life to realise this life is not just about me, my family and my friends. This year so far, I get quite disappointed by the people around me, by myself too. I'm sure we all feel that before. Because I dont understand them well, they dont understand me well. But we can always take hope in knowing Jesus knows me, He knows you. More than we know about ourselves in fact if you have ever experienced it.

He gave me Himself, that's why I'm still well and living.

i want my four dollar back

Hello. School's still pretty okay. I forgot to bring thermometer, yay. Reminded myself thousand times but well. Haha. Good thing SA sells thermometer at $4! =D NV sells like $10. Hyperinflation.
I went for SFC today and it was quite nice. We played some games and had bible study. Before that was quite hesitant about going. But well, I'm really glad God answered my prayer for people who filled my time in between my free time. (:
May my valentines' day be good tml, cause' I'm getting back chinese test result. Actually I pretty much like Chinese passages. The writers always sound so thoughtful. And I think my chinese teacher's pretty nice. She got us this cracker that has those paper slips inside. Reminds me of the teacher who got that for us in NV. I think it was Ms Chen. (:

BFC, here are the photos. =D Sorry for late posting. I'm putting here first while I 'recover from the internet fright'.

more than reminiscence

Troopers from my cell group =D


Van ride (:


Street of Aceh.


Cool Chinese uncle at the coffeeshop. (:


That tasteless tea, was my tummy's best friend during the trip.


At the supermarket in Aceh.


Church at aceh. See the eagle thing behind. It's Isaiah 40:31 in Bahasa Indo! =D Wonderful drawing btw, I can never draw like that.. Haha.


Some of the girls at the beach. (:


Palong which they sets out to catch fish. There's a light in the middle that they use in the night to attract the fishes.


Layeun. Indo mee for breakfast, see I wasn't kidding you. (:


Chantik little girl we met (:


A long walk to the temporary airport cause' the other one was burnt down on the first day of our trip =D

won't you rise up again?

May this be an encouragement to you.

Despair. Another source of cowardice is despair. Sometimes we look at where we are and where we want to be, and the gulf seems so great that we think, A million years will pass before I'll get anywhere near where I need to be; if I'm that far away, why try?
But glory shines in the Christian who refuses to give up. She's beaten , she falls, she stumbles, she cracks, she breaks, she bends, but through it all, she keeps getting up. The courage not to quit is often the thread by which our Christian growth continues.

I just dig out the discipleship journal that Joe lent us long ago and was prepared to read it again for fun. I can't explain the comfort that I received just from the little excerpt above. Everyday seems like a struggle to get to school. Actually things would usually turn out well. But I don't understand why I still don't feel like going everyday. I think I can't find anything worth going for. In the past it would be, "Yay, I get to see my friends in school and chase them around." I loved going to school back then.
I'm glad I'm in SA. It teaches me alot to do things for Christ. Going to school for Christ. I felt bad because I gave in to the temptation today, I didn't go. Yes falling is a very sad thing, but it's even more sad if you just let this fall make you continue lying down there and feeling defeated.

Who am I?
That the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love
And watch me rise again.

Amazingly, I am preparing for tomorrow, preparing not to be plagued by the defeated mindset. Couldn't have done it without Jesus. He's my hope.

amazing love, how can it be

Talking to Tsao Hui about Math.

T: well actually most of the time I just give up and wait for the ans
Me: haha
Me: you gotta learn to love math
Me: maybe you imagine it's me
Me: then you might begin to love it =D
T: I think I would just hate it more that way. hahaha
Me: thanks alot )=
T: aww....just kidding punggol friend

Well, still everytime you get stuck with a Math qn. Try praying.
Or think of me. I can explain to your teacher about the vomit on your math assg. (:
-------------------------------------
Good day today. Thank you for your blessing.

found my sanctuary

Yay, I finally cleaned up my whole room. Sense of fulfillment, and somewhat tired. But well, now I can open both windows cause' in the past the bed's too near the window then scared got dust. Yup. I think the most things we have around us is just dust, dust and dust.
Yesterday was great day cause joyce and i went shopping at the very big This Fashion in dhoby ghaut. Little people so you can just try anything you want without fearing of ppl looking at you. I finally got the crop top I wanted. =D Sermon made me very very 'full'. Somehow, I get a lot of insight from the message and I just feel so happy. (: We had cell dinner at AMK hub subway. Sophia looked so embarrassed when all of us went, "Bye Sophia!" when we were leaving. Oh yes, subway club is very very nice. It's quite meaty. (:

Being in your comfort zone can be quite uncomfortable actually.

Funny funny. Yesterday I almost missed school cause' I woke up like 1hour later than usual. And when my dad told me that, in my sleepiness, I got up and "yay". Dad went, "huh?", I was quite surprised myself. How could I sound so alive. Haha. Never knew I dreaded school so much. But well, I decided to go cause' I don't quite want my Dad to lie in the parents' letter for me. Haha. I shall not stumble people! (: But well, I got to school just in time, perspiring and I was quite happy. Nice mini workout. (:
We played touch rugby for PE. It's quite fun, just that I think I need to unleash confidence. Yup, good time to realise there's a purpose for going through debate and stuff. Train my speaking skills, build up my confidence. I can never forget what went through my mind all those while. It's something like how badly you want to stand up but you just stay there sitting down. And you do know that once you pass that line of struggle, you end up feeling that surge of shiok-ness. (: Thank God for always being my strength and comfort whenever I feel defeated.
I think I really like to talk to adults. Somehow, I can just keep talking on and on with teachers. Like my CG tutor. She actually told me I have a Chinese news broadcaster look when I told her I wanted to be the next Cheryl Fox (not literally). Haha. My CG friend jokingly told me she won't want to watch the Chinese news if I really become one. )=
Great time shopping with Juv, Hc and Jm. Pardon me for taking time to decide what to buy. Need to make wise choices. I bought this skirt that is the most comfortable skirt I ever wore. It doesn't look my style, but well, I like it in every way. (:
Met up with joyce and boy, she's really a very good friend. She's the friend who will wait for the bus with you without asking. (; I just love talking to her. But I find myself too talkative nowadays. Haha. And finally I got through the sight-reading, sight-seeing and sight-singing thing. Was sharing with her about NYC audition. She went, "It's impossible to do that lar." So Hc, dont be upset. (:
Supper with cherlyn and jassy. Cher bought the needle-like heels. Got me to try it. Okay, quite cool, but not me. If I were to chase for a bus, 100% I will take off the heels and run. (: And swinging makes me feel young at heart once again. =D